For Your Consideration
This collection of insights includes reflective anecdotes, lessons learned from therapy, and select journal entries which have been integral in the healing process. Hopefully, there's some worthwhile food for thought for you here, too.​
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Periodically updated, so stay tuned!
"Jorchael"
(Insight)
You may have noticed a funky name signing off on emails since The Legacy Tour began. It's intentional. What started out as a silly merger of our names quickly became how we defined our entire relationship and worldview.
"Jorchael" is a concept of fulfillment. It's the fulfillment we sought and embodied in our endeavors and what we represented to each other. Jorchael symbolizes the richness of life we enjoyed. Simply put, it's our vision.
It's fascinating how powerful an unspoken understanding can be.
Honoring A Person
(Insight)
Legacy is what you carry forward. It's about the ideals and concepts that you willfully embody and refine with respect to time and experience. Memory is recall; it's focused on committing to specific rituals and traditions meant to evoke a sense of connection.
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Though individual preference will exist, neither is outright better than the other. What's important is that individual needs are met in order to satisfy peace of mind. Both require constant attention, intention, and action to do properly.
The Tree
(Journal Entry; December 25, 2023)
Merry Christmas My love,
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I still vividly remember our first holiday season together. We were in the midst of a pandemic, so things just felt so bleak and uncertain at times. We weren't even sure how, if at all, we would celebrate our true first Christmas together. That's actually what motivated me to "spontaneously" get the tree. The look on your gorgeous face when I managed to surprise you with it fully set up and decorated...in that moment, I vowed to do whatever necessary to keep you as fulfilled as you were then.
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This Christmas, I wanted to capture that feeling of fulfillment for myself. My experience today was rather therapeutic, and I discovered that what I sought was well within my reach. Perhaps it always was, I continued my exercise routine and made gumbo and a margarita that would have knocked you off your feet. A pretty simple day. It felt good to praise myself, and, for a moment, being completely free of the fear of doing this without you was a genuine feeling. More accurately, it was replaced by this newfound faith in myself.
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I got this.
Coming to the Fork
(Therapy Lesson)
Throughout your bereavement process, you must constantly bear in mind that the journey looks different for everyone. There's no rule book to this stuff, and, for that very reason, you should always give yourself some grace.
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When you're ready, there will come a time when the grief is accompanied by comfort. Comfort in what was, and comfort in what will be. As you find yourself "coming to the fork" (divergence of anguish and hope), you'll come to realize you're indeed at that advanced part of healing in which love outshines grief. Embrace it.